My Bumpy Road to Feeling Better #RoadtoRecovery #Fibromyalgia #AdrenalFatigue

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adrenal fatigueThis post is a long time coming.  I can’t remember the last time I had energy.  I have been complaining to doctors for YEARS, well over a decade, that I am just too tired for my age.  I saw several doctors in my late 20’s and they all said the same thing, lose a little weight, exercise, and you’ll feel better.  But even when I did lose weight and exercise, I was still EXHAUSTED all the time and my whole body ached.  As I went through my 30’s I had the same primary doctor.  He also dismissed my concerns but I had been made to think it was in my head so many times that I figured I was going to have to live like this forever.  I became increasingly depressed.  The more depressed I became, the more tired I became.  I saw psychiatrists who prescribed antidepressants to help with the depression but I still didn’t feel like I should.  I talked to therapist after therapist which helped with the depression but still I knew something wasn’t right.

A few years ago I took charge of my health.  I researched various medical conditions that sounded like how I was feeling and I stumbled upon Fibromyalgia.  Exhaustion- CHECK!  Aches and pains- CHECK!  Mental fog- CHECK!  And the list goes on.  Armed with information I went to my primary doctor and asked him if what I had was Fibromyalgia and he agreed with me that I was suffering from Fibromyalgia.  I went to a rheumatologist who confirmed my Fibromyalgia diagnosis and over the course of several months put me on a laundry list of meds- Cymbalta, Vyvanse, Nuvigil, Xyrem, and Lyrica.  You would think that with everything I was taking I would feel better but I didn’t.

As my 40th birthday approached I made 2014 the year that I would get my life back.  I had spent most of 2013 exhausted, sleeping on the couch, and basically checked out of life.  I did what I could to give my girls what they needed but I know that I wasn’t being the mom they needed.  I would wake up to help get them off to school and then sleep until it was time to pick them up from school.  I’d come home with them, they would have a snack, relax, and start their homework.  Some nights I was too tired to make dinner or help them with their homework so I would just sleep on the couch as they did their work.  I am blessed to have 2 daughters who do well in school so they didn’t need me for much of their homework but I still felt guilty.  Plus I knew they wanted to get outside to play with me, or do arts and crafts with me, or even cook dinner with me.  They know about my illness and are very understanding about it, but I felt like I was failing them, failing my husband, and failing myself.

In January of this year I found a new primary doctor who I adore.  She listened to my concerns and ran lots of tests.  She said that if I wasn’t feeling on top of the world with all the meds I was taking that I wasn’t taking the right meds.  In addition to Fibromyalgia she diagnosed me with diabetes, high cholesterol, thyroid problems, and severe adrenal fatigue.  That was a wake-up call for sure.  But for the first time in forever I had hope.  My new doctor had a plan.  She put me on medications to control my diabetes and thyroid issues and slowly I’ve been able to ween off of most of my other meds.  We discovered that the root of my problem wasn’t just the Fibromyalgia, but the adrenal fatigue.  What I love about my new doctor is that she supports the use of alternative treatments in conjunction with conventional medicine.  And that began my healing journey and my love of essential oils………

Keep an eye out for my next post about my healing journey…..coming soon……

 

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I Wish You Could See What Is Hidden

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fibromyalgiaHaving a “hidden” illness can be very frustrating.  I have Fibromyalgia and it has taken a while for even my family to understand.  It is hard for everyone around me because I look “healthy”.  They can’t see the pain I am in or the exhaustion I feel on a daily basis.  Even my husband took a long time to understand even a little bit how I feel.  I can almost handle the daily aches and pains, but for me the exhaustion is the worst.  Some days I can’t even get out of bed.  My doctor also said I have severe adrenal fatigue and a few other disorders which also compounding the situation.  But from the outside I look “normal”.  Only a few of my close friends really know what I am going through.  The other parents at my girls school must think I am a flake when I sometimes have to cancel volunteering because I am just too exhausted or in too much pain.  I do what I can, when  I can, but some days it takes everything out of me just to do the regular daily things I need to do for my family.  I don’t want pity.  It’s not about that.  I just wish people could see what is hidden without me having to say something.  It would be nice if everyone just understood and was a little more patient with me.  There are days when I do feel great and I will be able to give 110% but on those days when I can’t give 10%, I say a silent prayer that those around me will have patience.

The good news is that I started seeing a new primary doctor who has switched some of my medications.  I am also eating healthier and using alternative treatments such as essential oils and I am starting to feel some relief.  I will keep updating on my health and hopefully one day I will feel “normal”.

For all of those that suffer from a “hidden” illness, you are not alone.  To all of you who are healthy, please remember those of us who are not.  Be patient with others no matter what you think you know about them.  There might be things hidden inside of them that they, too, wish you could see so please be patient and kind to everyone.

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